I love Instagram; it's the first app I check in the morning, it's the one I come back to multiple times a day and it's the last one I look at before I go to bed. Scrolling through, seeing how the vast sea of people I follow are living their lives. But something's starting to give. Everything I see is starting to be repetitive - the similar looks, the new trends, feeds starting to mirror each other. It's jarring.
I can't say I'm any different. I got inspired by various bloggers and fashion lovers on Instagram, decided to switch it up and now I have a very "aesthetic" feed, or something that's trying to be aesthetic. And even I'm starting to get all in my head about whether what I want to post fits my feed, whether everything looks uniform, are there too many pictures of me? Are there not enough? Are there enough product images? Can I slip in a random quote post here and there? It's becoming exhausting and I never used to be like that. But I think it comes with the territory of trying to make your social media and blog into a job.
I'm not a self-employed blogger yet. I've not been endorsed or sponsored or partnered with any brands. I may have done a collaboration here or there, but nothing that ran for longer than a post or two. I'd love to work with brands or companies that would be willing, but they'd also have to be ones I actually endorse on my own. So that means I have to create content that their brand feels fits them. I hope it'll happen in the future, but it'll take time.
The next thing is followers - you get some, you lose some. Sometimes I get to 1000, the next minute I've dropped down to 950. I'm trying to figure out ways to broaden my following but I don't want to do that without being true to myself, that's something I definitely pride myself on. I haven't lost sight of what I actually want to create or my personal style.
My personal style - ever changing, never settled. However lately, I've found out a bit more about what I like and don't, can easily say "no" to the latest trends that don't fit me and know what suits my body. I don't want to fall into the trap of "buy this now because everyone wants it". I want to wear what I think is beautiful and I don't care if I wear it more than once. You will definitely see across "influencer" (I hate that word) platforms that some of their content is the same or they are wearing the same thing or never ever wearing the same thing twice. Girl, bye. I do not have that luxury to just wear something once and even if I did, I wouldn't do it. I invest. Bought that dress, yeah I'll wear it a whole bunch. I have one good bag, my Gucci, I wear that sucker all the time. For the first time ever, in 5 years, I put it to a cleaning service because my baby needed it and now I feel like I'm missing something.
Trends will come and go, I will stay. The whole athleisure, ugly dad sneakers malarky is not for me. I'll try athleisure, but it will probably be when I actually hit the gym. Certain people can really pull it off and want to, me not so much. We buy into these things that celebrities or "influencers" (ugh, god make it stop) splash across their feeds because we think that's the in thing. But if you don't actually like it, don't wear it. That's the way I look at it. Now Kim Kardashian can totally pull of the biker shorts, crop top, ugly dad sneakers and a fanny pack with style. Is it my favourite style on her? No. But does she look good? Hell yeah. Does that mean I need to buy into it? No. Not if I don't like it. And not to point the finger or to ridicule, but I feel like everyone is trying to be a Kardashian/Jenner lately. Don't get me wrong, I love the Kardashians and hello, I want Kim's body right now. Also they won Halloween as Victoria's Secret Angels and my goal is to pull that off next year. But everyone is trying to look like them or have their bodies or act like them - be your own person. Sometimes I'm on instagram, I'll scroll by an image that looks like Kim K, then double take and realise it's not her. And I'm bored of that.
Hence why I got rid of a whole bunch of accounts from my follow list that bored me. I follow all my friends and family, brands that I love, celebrities that I love and bloggers (I can't use the "i" word again, it'll kill me) that fuel my fire and give me inspiration. I surround myself with people who inspire, rather than just deal with the mundane. I want to see and read inspirational stories, smile when I see something and actually love and endorse what I see rather than just scroll through. Which is what I want my social media to be. I want it to be a reflection of myself - the good and bad. Yes, I may be trying to stylise my photos, but I am no model. I'm not going to be picture perfect, nor will my pictures be perfect, but I'm okay with that. Yes I have a new aethestic and for the first time, it feels like me. So maybe my pictures may look a little repetitive, but I'm trying to make them different. Yes I've taken inspiration from others, but I'm trying to build my own path. I'm figuring it out. I don't want to fall into a niche, I want to be different. I want people, like you reading this, to want to come back to my blog or Instagram or Twitter and say "Hey, I really like what she's saying."
Outfit: Dress - Oh My Love London // Hat - Old // Shoes - Aldo (ON SALE!) // Bag - Gucci (old)
The point, in another one of my very long posts, is be someone different. The most cliché quote of all time: "Don't fit in, stand out", but it's true. Don't be afraid to be yourself. If you want to share the good days, go for it. Even if you want to share the bad, don't be afraid to. There's always going to be someone out there who relates and will be grateful for your openness. So what if the image doesn't fit the mould, just post it if you like it. In a world of wannabes, be you because there's no one better. As my mum says, "My face, my book" (in regards to facebook), but she makes a point - it's your platform to use as you wish, not how anyone else wants.
Lots of love,
Emily xx
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